welcome to commonplace book, a series in which i type up resonant excerpts from the books i’m reading. here is (nearly) every line i underlined, circled, and starred, as well as my own marginalia and musings; it’s somewhere between sparknotes and a list of theses, theories, and thoughts. some quotes may have been edited for clarity, but the heart of each idea remains the same.
chapter seven — greed — simply love
in a world without love the passion to connect can be replaced by the passion to possess. while emotional needs are difficult, and often impossible to satisfy, material desires are easier to fulfill… the desire to possess ceases satisfaction under capitalism; we always want to own more.1
we define ourselves by our objects and which brands we buy. american culture is obsessed with possession, both of products and people. we view one’s partner as an accessory, a component of our brand identity under capitalism. and we often view partners as belonging to us, not individuals that cannot be possessed.2
in poor communities, where addiction is the norm, there is no culture of recovery. of course, the ravages of addiction are more glaringly obvious in the lives of the poor and dispossessed because they have neither the means to engage in the cover-ups so effectively employed by privileged addicts nor the access to recovery programs.3
when the poor -- particularly the unhoused -- suffer from addiction it is a moral failing barring them from the human rights to food, shelter, and — dare i say? — love. when the rich are addicted, it is a tragic example of an individual’s suffering through no fault of their own; it is an exception rather than evidence of a culture that foregoes connectedness in exchange for another kind of addiction, an addiction to excess and opulence.4
both men and women remain in dysfunctional, loveless relationships when it is materially opportune;5 for most women throughout time, marriage has been —and still often is — necessary for material survival; marriage is a monetary exchange.6
the combination of the lust for material wealth and the desire for immediate satisfaction are the signs that this materialism has become addictive. the need for instant gratification is a component of greed.7
amazon poisoned us into thinking that rapid delivery is free and that paying for shipping is a scam. nothing is free, especially not convenience. amazon grooms us into wanting more and more instant gratification for our material desires, planting in us an addiction to rapid consumption, while amazon’s laborers get paid as little as possible, making bezos richer and richer, his laborers working relentless hours and under inhumane conditions just to provide the privileged with that new kitchen gadget that we just needed to have within twenty-four hours.8
when the practice of love invites us to enter a place of potential bliss that is at the same time a place of critical awakening and pain, many of us turn our backs on love.9
this is the outcome of living in a culture where the politics of greed are normalized. the message we get is that everybody wants to have more money to buy more things so it is not problematic if we lie and cheat a bit to get ahead. unlike love, desires for material objects can be satisfied instantly if we have the cash or the credit card handy, or even if we are just willing to sign the papers that make it so we can get what we want now and pay more later. concurrently, when it comes to matters of the heart we are encouraged to treat partners as though they were objects we can pick up, use, and then discard and dispose of at will, with the one criteria being whether or not individualistic desires are satisfied.10
this is the same mentality that often disguises itself as "self-care;" resenting and ignoring obligations to others in the name of the self as if another being is not a person themselves worthy of care and love. choosing whether to fulfill a commitment based solely on your own needs is a brand of self-care at odds with community care, when caring for the self should actually feed the community too. rest is a need capitalism denies, but in response to a culture of cruelty we have created a simultaneously cruel culture: a culture of narcissism that prioritizes an individual’s feelings above the feelings and rights of the collective. we cope with capitalism’s demands by buying into the self care economy, fueling capitalism further, rather than organizing a more loving culture for everyone to enjoy, regardless of class. an amazon worker, tirelessly toiling through the night to get you your face masks for your self care sunday is not enjoying their own paid time off to spend time with family or take care of themselves. self care is a coping method, not a collective solution to a culture that denies human needs, most blatantly the needs of the lower classes.11
cynicism about love leads young adults to believe there is no love to be found and that relationships are needed only to the extent that they satisfy your desires.[people are treated] as disposable. committed bonds cannot last when this is the prevailing logic.12 a person is not a product.13
greed wipes out individual recognition of the needs and concerns of everyone, replacing this awareness with a harmful self-centeredness. healthy narcissism (the self-acceptance, self-worth, that is the cornerstone of self-love) is replaced by a pathological narcissism (wherein only the self matters) that justifies any action that enables the satisfying of desires. the will to sacrifice on behalf of another, always present when there is love, is annihilated by greed. no doubt this explains our nation's willingness to deprive poor citizens of government-funded social services while huge sums of money fuel the ever-growing culture of violent imperialism.14
i have been astonished by hearing individuals who inherited wealth in childhood warn against sharing resources because people needing help should work for money in order to appreciate its value.15
the rich get free healthcare, free education, and other benefits that socialist policies would reward us all, and yet the rich continue to warn against socialism, believing that they are the only ones deserving of these free resources, that inheriting these resources is somehow a more earned way to have your needs met than for the government to provide these resources.16
working hard is rarely the means by which enough of us can gain enough access to material resources to become wealthy. one of the ironies of the culture of greed is that the people who profit the most from the earnings they have not worked to attain are the most eager to insist that the poor and working classes can only value material resources attained through hard work. of course, they are merely establishing a belief system that protects their class interests and lessens their accountability to those without privilege.17
like so many americans, she believes that the pursuit and attainment of wealth will compensate for all emotional lack… ironically, the rich who grow greedier and overprotective of their wealth are increasingly as perpetually stressed and dissatisfied as the greedy poor who suffer endless cravings. the rich cannot get enough; they cannot find contentment.18
greed has a way of severing the cords of compassion.19 indeed, we ignore the starving masses in this society, the thirty-eight million poor people whose lives are testimony to our nation's failure to share resources in a charitable and equitable manner. the worship of money leads to a hardening of the heart.20
republicans love to say <<if you're not liberal when you're young you have no heart; if you're not a conservative when you're old you've got to brain;>> this quote always makes me think of how wisdom sits between the heart and the brain. there is no wisdom in a greed that turns a blind eye to the suffering of others for one’s own personal addiction to wealth and status.21
we are the richest nation on earth, yet we spend a trivial amount on our poor compared to that spent by every other western industrialized nation. one-fifth of america's children live in poverty. half of our african-american children live in poverty. we are the only industrialized western nation that does not have universal health care.22
many of our nation's citizens are afraid to embrace an ethics of compassion because it threatens their security. brainwashed to believe that they can only be secure if they have more than the next person, they accumulate and still feel insecure because there is always someone who has accumulated more.23
to maintain and satisfy greed, one must support domination. and the world of domination is always a world without love.24 money corrupts and absolute money corrupts absolutely.25
we are all vulnerable. we have all been tempted. even those of us committed to an ethic of love are sometimes tempted by greedy desires... the politics of greed are condoned… for the satisfaction of hedonistic pleasure.26
greed subsumes love and compassion; living simply makes room for them. living simply is the primary way everyone can resist greed every day. all over the world people are becoming more aware of the importance of living simply and sharing resources. the politics of communalism continue to matter. we can show respect for love. to save our planet we can stop thoughtless waste. when we value the delaying of gratification and take responsibility for our actions, we simplify our emotional universe. living simply makes loving simple.27
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