hi! i’m theodóra and this is field notes, a monthly dispatch from my notes app. i publish a few of my notes at the end of each month in chronological order with no added context, just the date and time of the recording, so that you can peek into someone else’s noticings about the world. whatever this project is — diary, poem, serial, obsession — i hope you enjoy it.
12.02.22
9:55 a.m.
[ jauntily macabre theme song plays ]
12.02.22
9:55 a.m.
my dad and i’s love language is preparing each other’s vitamins
12.02.22
9:57 a.m.
mother time
12.02.22
10:07 a.m.
i get this rash on my neck at the end of every year
like a noose
like an animal choking itself
a ribbon around me
i unwrap it and leave it in december
12.09.22
11:13 a.m.
you find evidence for what you choose to believe
12.11.22
11:27 a.m.
something died last night
emotionally hungover
i -
12.12.22
1:56 p.m.
“fashionable despair”
12.12.22
3:54 p.m.
seeking feeling like a little kid
12.12.22
4:01 p.m.
commit to the present moment with a full heart
12.12.22
9:28 p.m.
fruit forces you to eat with presence
to bend your life around the bananas
fruit won’t last
neither will you
12.17.22
3:29 p.m.
money isn’t real but it’s also the only real thing
12.17.22
4:58 p.m.
“don’t ask for directions from someone who’s never been to the place you’re trying to get to”
12.27.22
5:36 a.m.
there is no time as liminal as this
between christmas and the new year —
what comes out of the fog, the shadow
now? so gothic , something eerie , waking
in the middle of the night , eyes & mind wide
aware of all these weird , precious things
ruminating on wuthering heights —
12.27.22
7:54 a.m.
i’m more electric than usual
this time of year
i cannot stop sparking things
pure electricity
altering my environment
12.28.22
7:30 p.m.
in my left mind
12.30.22
11:50 p.m.
have you noticed that men love rules ?
thanks for reading field notes, a segment of collageville. please like, comment, and subscribe, if you’d like. :)
with love, theodóra
i remain in awe of your perception and talent